The Real, Real Last Post

Well this is it folks, my last one. Don't get this confused with my deceptacon "last post". I want to thank everybody who read my blogs and gave me feedback, I appreciate it. I hope you all got a better image of who I am as a person. This has been a good year, it should be said that high school goes by really fast. Even though there is a lot of pain and work in it, you got to do your best to enjoy it. A lot of the people you laugh with at school you may never cross paths with again after you graduate. Hold on dearly to these moments, to every moment, you must live them to the fullest. In this short life there is no time to spend in the past or future. We were not born to do our living inside of our thick skulls. Go experience. Go do what you want to do and enjoy it, no one can do this for you. Spread love. There is nothing better you can do for everybody than to leave a positive impact in each of your footprints. Go make people smile and laugh, but do not try to change your own or others' emotions. Emotions must be felt and accepted for them to be used as a positive aspect of life. You all are beautiful individuals, do not stop your own blossoming, go into it. Alright though for real I love you all. There is no better way to say it. Go have fun with your life. Haha I hope Ms. Dornfeld gives me the points for this, I am trying to graduate! Stay Real Woodbury, this has been the elusive exclusive.
Much Love,
Kevin Noonan

Cool postin'

Yeah so I lied about that last blog being the very "last blog." I got some more for your eyes. So I cancelled my housing and registration and Duluth. It is now for sure that I am attending the U of M, I'm pretty excited. I am going to check out a party there tonight, some buddies of mine that graduated last year are having a house warming party in dinky town. It should be a pretty good time. Me and my friends have planned our next fishing/camping excursion. We are going 4 hours up north to Voyageurs National Park. It is a large string of islands in a complex system of lakes and rivers. I am ready to angle some monsters. Next monday is my last day of high school ever. I have a very strange feeling, I can't really tell if I am going to miss it or not. I think I will really just miss seeing all my aquaintances. I will have a lot of goodbyes and thank yous to give out before I leave the building. Lately my mind has been wandering to the topic of Eric and Chelsea, my fellow seniors who recently took their own lives. I wish they could have just waited until we were done with high school. I can still see Eric's face in my classes when I think about him. I know so many of us have thought of what it would be like if we died and what people's reactions would be. Eric and Chelsea made these thoughts seem so much more realistic, it pains me considerably. I know I will remember this for the rest of my life. I need to live on in their behalf.

The Last Blog

Here it is the final blog. Well senior year is almost at a close, and yet I am still a child haha. The other day i got into the Univeristy of Minnesota Twin Cities. I was pretty much set on going to Duluth after being wait listed at the U. Now i have a very difficult decision to make. This will take some time. I think I will enjoy both campuses but I don't know if I am going to allow this opportunity to go to the U slip away. Yesterday was the last day with my kid in early childhood development. His name was Devon and he was nothing short of a gangster. He is four years old and we actually became pretty good friends over our time spent together in that class. It was pretty sad to see him go for the last time. He brought me a thank you card. It was pretty damn cute, I gotta say. I hope he grows up strong and bold, I got high hopes for him. Lately I have realized I give out a lot of words of wisdom that I; myself, do not even live by. I found this to be a strange realization. I need to be more conscious of myself before making suggestions for others. This is difficult, but the best rewards come from the hardest work, most of the time. Life is very fragile, a very fragile beautiful gift. It is so easily stripped from us. I have just finished reading "All Quiet On The Western Front" and am currently enrolled in a World Wars course at school. There was so much life lost in those wars, so many men who will never get to blossom as human beings because all they had was given, and taken, in the wars. I find it pretty fitting that this weekend is Memorial Weekend, and I am contemplating all of this. Those men can not be forgotten, we must live on and achieve our dreams in their absence. I am going to a cabin up north with my family this weekend, it will be good to be in nature with my thoughts. It always comes back to mother nature, if you think about it we are all really a part of her. You can feel it when you're in untouched nature, away from industries. The trees and water bring fresh air and life to your body in every moment, it is stupendous. Love.

new ish

Thinking of a new topic, I get a new thought than tend to drop it. My attention is flippin on and off and it's hard to stop it. Another aimless rant is my final solution. Big problems need big solutions, like big spilled oil rig pollutions. We got real big economic institutions taking over the rights of the constitution. And what about the news kid? I got that propaganda news flash all on the TV. But I'm not really with that and that will never be me. I try to stay strong, believe, and just live through it. But before long a police state is at your door and they just kick through it. And im through with it. I can't just act happy like I'm cool with it. I refuse to be a fool with it. I do not want to hear about our plan in Iraq and Iran. I would rather give a prayer for the lost, dead in the sand. See it's mostly all madness, clear cut sadness. I got a heavy weight on me, do the ones responsible have this? So now i gotta rap this. Because whatever happens, happens, and I want it to be known. That I wasn't just a another laughin actin clone. I know I can't be alone. Please call my cellular phone and let me know I'm not alone. Or text me i got no preference. The fact we are living in a tech era is evident. I've had it with the bullshit that's not really relevant. I'm gonna scream out for the hell of it. Just to be. Why wont people free; their essence, i want to feel their presence, but mostly we all aren't really that present. But like they say big problems need big solutions. Like those big oil rig pollutions. Think of a solution? I really can't, but I might just let off an aimless rant.

Lake of the woods adventures part 2: the crestliner strikes back

We all got up at 4 am on saturday. Yes you read correctly. Half conscious, I gathered my poles and tackle and made my way down to the dock. It was still very dark out. We had 3 boats between 9 people so we split into 3 3-man teams and departed. My boat was the last to leave. Our resort was situated back in a bay so there was about a 10 minute boat ride to reach the actual lake front. My boat (which was a crestliner) got about half way when we started running into problems. The boat suddenly shut off by itself and the motor came up out of the water spontaneously. We were like wtf? So we put the motor back in and started on our way again, and it happened about 5 minutes later. So we put the motor back in once again and tried to keep going. The motor died like 5 more times before we decided to head back. Before doing so, we put the anchor in the water and watched the sun come up. It was beautiful. We barely made it back to the dock. Relieved, but frustrated; we returned to the campsite. We had to wait a couple hours for the lodge to open up so someone could look at our boat. To waste the time we made a good meal of brats and hashbrowns to eat up before we went out again. Eventually someone fixed our boat and we got on our way. I was excited to finally see the lake and all of it's glory. As we came out of the bay I was shocked at first glance when I saw the sheer size of the massive body of water. You can't even see across it. After snapping a couple pics we began to fish. We fished for about 3 hours but with little luck. We retired for the rest of the afternoon and met the rest of our group at our campsite. We filleted some of the fish the other boats caught (including a 26 inch walleye and a 28 inch northern) and we ate them up for dinner. We all went out again in the evening. We all got in new groups and went off into the lake once again. Me and my new group ended up getting the crestliner stuck in the mud in a shallow zone of the bay. We had to actually get into the frigid water and pull the motor out of the muck, it was miserable. It was worth it though because we stopped at a state park beach on a pier and watched the sun go down. It was one of the most incredible sights I have ever seen. The sky was different shades of red, orange, purple, and blue. The water complimented this scene, it really made me appreciate the beauty of life. After this astonishing scene we boated back into our dock and returned to our site. We enjoyed another fire and stargazed. The stars up there are unbelievably bright and you can make out many constellations. Most of the group retired pretty early but me and 2 other friends stayed up very late discussing the concept of life and human behavior. It was very enlightening hearing my buddy's points of view. We eventually retired to our tents so we could get up early enough to pack up and leave at a relatively early hour. All in all it was a great trip. It really brought me closer to my friends and mother nature. We all agreed we would do it again soon.

lake of the woods adventures Part 1

On friday of last week, 8 friends and I embarked on a fishing expedition that took us all the way up to the beautiful lake of the woods in northern Minnesota. The drive was long, taking about about six and a half hours. We spent our time in the car shooting dice on my phone. Pretty much we gambled all the way up and I came out with a few extra dollars. One of my friends made about 15 bucks, another lost about 10. We were ecstatic when we finally reached our destination. We took no time in setting up our campsite at the resort. We got our tents put up and we started to feast. We all brought way too much food so we decided we better get an early start on it. I made some polish sausages on the grill (which were tasty) and we just kicked back by the fire. We could not go out and fish on our boats until the opener, which was the next day, so we decided to cast off the dock a little bit. I was the first successful fisherman in the group when i snagged a little northern. It was about 14 inches so I just tossed him right back into the murky depths. After about a hour or so we got bored of this activity and retreated back to our campsite. We got a roaring fire going and we just kicked it. I whipped out the guitar for some campfire jams and we got some music going. We ate and drank until our last two friends arrived at the lake around midnight. They had left much later than us. So after about another hour of socializing with our newly arrived companions, we decided it would be time to hit the hay. We were to have an early morning.

Steady Bloggin'

Another thursday, chilling in the library trying to get some words in the blog. Ya know whats good. Right now I'm pretty excited for my fishing trip this weekend. Me and some homies from the way are going up to scenic and quite massive lake of the woods. The wilderness feels inviting after months of indoor living. I feel it will be a real breath of fresh air mentally and physically. Hopefully I do not get rained on, but none the less I plan on having a great time. Yesterday I attended another Twins game at the new stadium. The boys came through with a win so that was legit, they have won all 3 games I have seen at the new joint. Delmon Young is really coming along, he was the key player with two doubles and a single, hitting three for four. It feels good to see Joe Mauer healthy, and back in the line up. I think the Twinkies got a world series season brewing over at Target Field. Lately I have been freestyling more. I kind of quit rapping for a minute when I picked up the guitar, but now I'm back at it. I suppose I just had a few of those times when I wasn't confident enough to put down flow, and I got discouraged. I have learned you have to be sure of yourself if you are to succeed. How can others rely on you if you can't even rely on yourself? It's a crazy game that life, but like it or not; a little confidence helps you win. People judge you the moment they see you, regardless if they are conscious of that fact or not. A lot can be told about a person by the way they carry themselves.

clever title here

What do you want to read about? What do you want to hear? About my struggles? Joys? Meditations? It is all pretty trivial at this point. When trying to write something of substance I usually lose myself along the way. I want to stay present through this writing. I don't want to list off a bunch of ideals I believe you should live your life by, because I don't practice a lot of what I preach so why should you. I just want to go home and go to bed. If sleep debt exists I am pretty deep in the hole. Where do I begin to feel young and innocent again? I can stop my actions but just the knowledge I now contain within myself will forever stain me. I want to believe there is a positive future over the horizon but there is not. Not anymore. How do I succeed? By making a lot of money and having a nicer house to worry inside of? I don't know if I have grown as a person at all or if I have just been shrinking away from what is pure. What is pure? Love? The word is used in so many instances. Is love the way I feel when I am in nature feeling the trees give me energy? Or is it just the overpowering feeling of lust that can take over from time to time? Maybe it is simply a smile from a friend to a friend. Yeah thats a good feeling, I can go with that. I wanted to end my blog post in that last sentence but I was not completely sure if that would be "enough" to get the points.

Hey Hi Whats up? Your attention please!

As good hip hop floods my ears with sick beats i begin to bust out some words. Lately there has been some weight on my shoulders, with all the graduation business and my lack of attention span conflicting with my increasing work load. I still find a lot of time to smile though, but on the other hand there is also sorrow. But I feel they are in a healthy cycle although it is hard to except emotions at times. I find it beneficial to take a step back and look at the big picture, this usually makes me stop feeling sorry for myself. Life is a precious thing, if you can't love life than it is usually hard to love in general. I know sometimes that I get that empty feeling that I am not quite complete as an invidual but that is hogwash. How could I be more complete? If i had a another arm maybe? Nah two is just fine, but the third could probably help me sort out some of the more difficult chords on the guitar. I am getting quite excited for the warm season. My senses are longing for the familiar indulgences of the summer and it's activities. Excitement for college life has also set in pretty deep in my brain, I am looking forward to the radical change. High school really does go by as fast as the burnout graduates tell you. My only adivce to incoming students would be just to take it all in and not to get lost in your own mind when going through their education. As dull as the whole experience may seem, it does bring you closer to the people you love everyday. But that is just from my perspective I can not see through your eyes, but I can look into them. Nice eyes ya got there.

On Entering The Library

Once again today after lunch, I mistakingly went to the classroom instead of the library and got owned when the door was locked. I got over it though and began my retreat to the other side of the building. As I walked it occured to me just how close I was to being finished with this place forever. Matt had brought up an interesting point earlier when he had asked me about whether or not it was the building itself that was making my time here dull or if it was the individuals themselves. I thought about it for a moment and probably decided it was a mixture of both. Everyone here, myself included, are mostly just zombies that roam the halls once a bell is rung. But there is the exception of those few moments that you are around those you feel comfortable with, and your real self comes out. But I suppose a change of scenery could help too. It is pretty unsignificant though when it comes down to it. But then what is significant? Your shoes? Blogging? Loving? Life itself is the only thing that is of true significance. Everything else is just experiences inside life. Wait what am I talking about? I guess if you understood than we are on the same page but then again these words can be interpreted in any which won woozle way you want. I am only trying to write something you will find entertaining.
Trying to catch the moment but lost and unfocused =
Push keys and reread, another backspace
another day, another dollar, another sad waste
Want to surrender, but still defensive
Trying to hard, way too apprehensive.
Please, please let it be let it be
I want to find truth in everything I see
I want to let go and and be free be free
But all I can do is let it be let it be

What? a new post? good smoogles mcboogles!

Haha yeah i start it with a laugh, the post i made in my creative writing class. Ya better read this with some rhythm or some soul. Ya better listen close to whats about to unfold. See it all started back in 92', when a little dude name Kevin came out the womb. He looked around and yelled out move, A real OG is about to come through. Now he knew from the start that he was a tad different, he grew into a teen and with his parents he became mad distant. He did not have a path and he really did not enjoy math. But he did have good friends that helped him get past. A lot of times his mind got clouded, other times he took a step back and he re-routed. He was unaware of the shadows where the demons were shrouded. Kevin tried to keep it on the straight and narrow, but soon took the bait and swallowed. Almost at once he began to feel hollow, Kevin's deep oceans of life were emptied and shallow. But for what? He asked himself the same question? Can one teach and learn in the same lesson? He had his own gun in his hand something like a Smith & Wesson. I don't expect you or yours to get anything more then words and bore, from this. Just know that this itself is more that words on a screen. It's the real life expression of a fellow human being. We are all a part of the same team. Take a walk in my shoes and you may understand what I mean. Am i a fiend? A friend? A Dream? A means to an end? I don't know I don't know I don't know

The Monster Ate It

The monster ate it. There is no room to debate it or contemplate it. You can hate it. Thats your preference, I dont really care. Kind of like how i have no interest in your hair. But to be fair the monster lives in a well concealed lair. Maybe something like the lair of a hibernating bear. Now this lair, is located where; fair is foul and foul is fair. You may be thinking where and how, and I may tell you there and now. If you were to see it, or peep it, you may say wow. You may even raise your left eye brow, I don't really mind. Everyone needs a little time to unwind, and everyone enjoys someone thats fine. It seems as if people search for the divine but come up short in everything they find. Whoa. Sometimes I feel as if there is a hole in my soul. Where love turns to hate and even hot coals feel cold. There is a certain ache, a certain pain. That I can not take and has no refrain. There are other times my heart feels full, with true love that feels so bold, but after awhile the cycle grows old and I feel as if my life's story has alredy been told. It is hard to break the mold, to be come selfless, to lose the ego, and not be selfish. Sometimes I want to hide inside the shells of shellfish. In the end I would just like to wish everyone wellness, and to stop worrying about where they think hell is. For when you look at your true worth, you are about a speck of sand on this amazing earth. But true happiness exists and you can't fake it, you could be spontaneous and others may hate it. There is a lack of compassion and you may think why? Hell you may even say it. But when others ask where your dignity is, tell them that the monster ate it.

Passion

To feel passionate about something is a truly wonderful thing. To feel love in what you are doing and to feel pure undistorted joy is something to behold. I see many people taking part in activites they seemingly enjoy but without passion. What is this? People take something that came from a passion and turn it into a chore, a habit. This saddens me deeply. Nothing beneficial can come to your real self when you are taking part in activities as a robot! Be present! Indulge yourself! You can not make new music playing the same song continuously. With passion comes creativity and with creativity comes fresh new experiences. A person can be a veteran at a certain activity but feel like they are experiencing it for their first time every time. Think about this for a moment. Life should not be something that is set in stone. Let your passions engulf your being. There is nowhere you can't be passionate. One should try to be passionate about life itself. Let your creativity blossom. What keeps individuals in their robotic schedules of behavior each day? Is it fear of being critiqued? Fear of not being accepted? None of this should be relevant to the way people act but it is. Hmmmmm.... I have been sidetracked. Or have I? I'm not quite sure. I do know I was passionate about this writing and I enjoyed it a lot more because it is so hahaha. Hey guys take a step out of the ordinary some time you may enjoy the results.............................. peace/love

Human Drives

What drives a person to live from day to day? Is it all wants for personal gain? The want for an ideal partner of the opposite sex? The want for money and material wealth? The want for drugs or a high? Or is it just the want for social acceptance? In a lot of people all of these can be a factor, I know that I myself have been tormented by these beasts of burden from time to time. Then I think about what all these wants really are, and I see that these are not healthy human drives. These drives would imply that you are unsatisfied with yourself as a person, when really you already have all the necessary tools as your disposal to be a healthy happy human being. Sure, you may achieve all of those things and attain all of the material and social perks that come with it but in the end you are still the same person. You are still the same body, the same mind, the same entity as a whole, but you have just been dressed in nicer robes. These robes may make you feel more confident, more whole as a person. What happens when the time comes to take off the robes? Or what if an event transpires that stripes you of your material or social wealth? You will than feel more incomplete than you did before you were well off in these ways. It is best to live life in a state of acceptance and love. You can still strive to attain or achieve the things that truly make you feel happy, but just know you are still whole as a person along the way. Let love of life be your drive to succeed.

They fell down, hard.

Why did they all fall down? Was it because the media poisoned the masses? Was it because younger and younger generations strive to take part in sex and drugs? Was it because T-Pain discovered how to create talent without having it? Or was it just because Alicia Keys said so? Maybe it is a mixture with concentrated doses of all of the above. All I do know is that they did in fact fall down, and it is a deep hole with few tools to assist the climb out. I know this because of first hand experience. I feel the only way to stay up is to come back to your true self. Most people do not realize that most of the time they are just living behind the curtain of their own egos. And that behind that curtain is the most overwhelmingly beautiful act ever to grace the eyes of human beings. Instead people let the opinions of others and their own negative thoughts keep the curtain in place. Some may peek their head around the curtain at times but are terrified when they see the audience that awaits them. But why? Because you are afraid of what people think? Because your afraid to live outside the norm? This is why we fall down. Only your true self and being can overcome this. People may ridicule you, but this is only out of their own insecurities. People may say or do things that damage your ego, but are they in fact damaging your true self? The answer is no. Until the day you feel strong enough to pull back the curtain and unveil your true purpose, you will continue to fall down. I encourage everyone to stand up and pull back the curtain. Let the show begin. Let life begin.

Cool Beginnings

So this is the blog life. I do not really know where to start except for bringing up the fact there is a high chance this blog will be really cool, hence the name. I just want to start by telling a little about myself. My name is Kevin, I am currently a senior attending WJH and I am enrolled in the Creative Writing 2 class. I have started this blog to record my own life and times and to give you a taste of my daily business. I live a life of transition at the moment, feeling to old to be a kid yet too young to be an adult. It can be overwhelming at times but I am ready to move forward to the next stage of my life. I am looking forward to the college life and the freedoms that come with it. I just hope I can keep up with the studies and not get caught up in the cool life. I enjoy partying with my friends and I am really trying to soak up the last few months I have to spend with them. I have come to the conclusion that it is best to live in the moment. It really does generate the ultimate joys in one's life. I do not consider myself religious, spiritual maybe, but even that label can be misleading. Playing the guitar brings me enjoyment that not many other activites can. Agressive rollerblading is pretty cool and it is something that is fun to do when the fear of getting hurt is not a factor. This is just scratching the surface but it is a start.
Til Next Time Bloggers,
Stay Cool